The thought of YoI boys going through French Event Planning™ cracks me up so much

lazuliblade:

You–!!! I can’t stop laughing now! OK, wait wait, but actually:

  • Imagine if Victor won the gold there. He would look at that crappy laminated cardboard (it was plastic, I know) medal placed around his neck, lift it up to scrutinize it, and have this look of utter disgust.
    • Never has he felt more offended at a competition.
    • He covers it up with that kind of sharp smile he does to hide his discontent.
  • Or if Yuuri won gold, and offers it to Victor to kiss… “I’m sorry, love, but that gold medal… isn’t. I’ll just kiss you instead~!”
  • Yuuri would feel so cheated. This is his first GPF gold and it isn’t even gold!
  • The sheer horror on Victor’s face as his precious Yuuri wobbles on that podium when all three competitors climb up to the 1st place podium for the group picture.
  • No flags for the medalists during the National Anthem of the winner? Yuuri is secretly really disappointed. He’d always wanted to see the hinomaru hanging in the 1st place position at one of these major events.
    • All three of the medalists turn around wildly searching for the flags before realizing there are none.
    • Then they awkwardly stand there.
    • Yuuri fidgets with the bouquet of 5 flowers.
  • No banquet. Victor would cry.
    • Yuuri consoles him with a promise to get wasted and dance back at home. “We can make it special – just the two of us!”
  • The Kiss&Cry chairs being single seats – Victor would just pull Yuuri into his lap.
  • The crappy ice that looks like a storm hit it and left behind puddles. Yurio would swear up a storm.
  • The music mix-up happens to Otabek, and Yurio is off to the side feeling so disillusioned with the intelligence that the event organizers are supposed to have. 
    • He thought championship type events were supposed to be run well. Especially now that he’s a Senior.
  • Chris and Victor decide to speak (and swear under their breaths) in French because they may as well use the language to express their displeasure for how this entire event was run.
  • Victor does the interviews largely in French and drops little hints at how disappointed he is, or how he wishes he could have enjoyed himself more… 
    • “Seeing these medals makes me nostalgic of my childhood. I used to play with hockey pucks this size and weight before I stuck with figure skating. The plastic looks hardy enough too! Perhaps Yuuri and I will have a fun game when we get back to St. Petersburg.”
    • “The French event planners were so considerate. For my last GPF I would have liked to have seen the Russian flag hanging during the National Anthem. By not having a flag, they gave me one more reason to continue competing for a year. Yes, I’ll compete one more year so I can have a wonderful final GPF!”
  • Victor and Yuuri decide it’s not worth it to stay and shop in France. They fly back to St. Petersburg and try to forget this ever happened.
    • “Let’s go, Yuuri. Aeroflot has better management than this event!”
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(French Event Planning™ We’re referring to the 2016 GPF in Marseille this year. The plastic medals, the wobbly podiums, the absence of national flags, the sparse Men’s bouquets, the questionable ice quality, the single seats, the multiple music mix-ups, the lack of a banquet… all of this actually happened. Many of us have agreed to just laugh and move on.)

Please, please, please, add on your own headcanons – I want to read them!